Past is Past

Little still imprinted...

I have nothing to think after that day passed away liked a wind blow my hair. It was so weird knowing I couldn't move my thought from those moments. You knew that you were the one and only, the most special and golden guy who ever coloured my days even just a little time I could spend with you. But, you also knew, right, little still imprinted. 

Don't lie...

You knew nothing about my self because you acted like, uh, you didn't care to me. Were you too shy to tell the world that exactly you did? You seemed indeferent to me and all my acts, but truly you weren't. I knew your heart, don't make a mess. How could you hide those feelings if you cried liked a baby wants a ballon in front of your lovely close teacher and told him that you were really sad because I cut the relationship of us and made sure that we would never ever getting back together? I knew, I knew. Don't lie to me because I still could see your feelings deep inside your eyes. 

Patient...

Through everyday bright and dark moments, happiness and sadness, clear and rough, sunny and stormy, I just hadn't seen you giving the truth to everybody that you care. Yes you gave, but just for me. Could you show that to the universe? I was scared that you just did that in front of me because you felt pity to me. But, I wasn't a girl who would like to call you a despicable guy. That was why I was patient to wait for the right time -maybe-. 

Little but precious...

I could feel every mild energy that you shared to me silently, even that was just a wink of an eye and a glance gaze of serenity. They couldn't see and I could. They couldn't feel but I could. They were blind, while we weren't. Those were little but precious, just we knew. 

Two-bit? 

Liked what I thought, they didn't know anything about this life, meaned, my life, no, ours. Couldn't stop judging me that I was just waiting for the flood on the dessert, "You will never have!". Help me, they 'mocked' me like I was just a two-bit girl and you were the prince I wanted to be with in the fairy world and magics around us. 

Yes, they were blind, not me, not you. In fact that they couldn't see any single precious thing that you gave to me. Haha, yeah I was just a two-bit girl that you always mocked. 

You didn't know me. 

Opposite...

They realized that they were wrong and I wasn't like they thought before. Yuhuu! I won! Thanked to them knowing the fact they supported this life and never gave a damn to us, they appreciated. That was the first opposite.

On the other side,you showed me really annoying and unexpected treatment. Why the hell you dared to touch that trashy thing, omg?! You hadn't left me but you, argh, can't you guys read my mind, please, I can't tell this, this is just too hard for me. 

Oh, yeah, forgot, dude, forgot! Good and bad came together as they held each hand tightly. But, I din't expect this nightmare to come to my life, I wasn't ready, but I was already here, willy-nilly I had to take this. 

We repeated all those silly things until a years ago and always together until that day came and we had to be a single stick again 'till now. I willingly let you go with thousands jars of greatest moments stand by my side until this day. I always try to let them burned-out and go by the ashes in the air, but unfortonately the wind not on my side, it blows that ashes to me. Huh, fruitless. 

I hope that those ash jars of greatest moments are only kept by me, so you don't have to feel the way I do. It hurts. Knowing I will never feel those cozy and mild things that you gave, eat valetines chocolates from you, read your weird lovely letters, and make a joke together. Past is past, right? And what can I do now just limited on dreaming. 

But anyway thankyou for everything you gave to me, you're the one and only ash that I still keep in my pocket and forever. And just don't care about those rambling words, okay, because the point is you're golden and I never can't forget you. 

Past is past :) 

Written with love and sincerity...

Thankyou so much guys for reading. I had to post this bcs I needed media(s) to share what I really feel and I thought this was the right one bcs I can and am allowed to write in the big capacity. Sorry for wrong words, spells or the arragements, this is my first time using English. Thank you and thankyou again guys!